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Showing posts from 2015

A Birth Mother in High School

It's my senior year now, and mason will be 2 years old in July. I will be walking across the graduation stage and receiving my technical professional high school diploma. It's been different being a a birth mother and still in school, I never dropped out or switched school. I am the only person in my class with a biological child running and laughing around. I love that I am unique. Here are my adorable senior pictures with little Mason Scott.

Mason Turns One

I am so blessed to have the open adoption that I do. Being able to see and spend time with Mason and his family is one of the greatest joy's I've ever experienced. Mason is one, time flies by. He can walk and yell, he loves to walk around with both of his arms in the arm like some macho man. I got him a TonkaTruck for his birthday.

He rams into everything and anyone in the way, he also loves to be pushed in it by his sister Amelia. I spent the first day in Utah at Mason's adoptive dad's family reunion. The next day we celebrated Mason's birthday. And the day after I got to just hangout and spend time with them. Friday I took my senior pictures, Mason is in them! Pretty cool to have adoption bless my life.

Mason Scott's Open Adoption and Placement

Happiness Comes From Within, Not "When"

Happiness. Where does it come from? Some people would say this, actually very many people have said this. "I will be happy when..." I'm pretty sure almost everyone has said that in some shape or form. The issue with only being happy when you get something or get to certain part in life, is that you will never be happy.

Being happy in the here and now is one of the most important things that you can do for yourself, especially to help you along through your trials. I remember when I was expecting Mason, that I would wish for things. I would always think to myself that once my boyfriend talked to me again, I would be happy. And the hardest part was, realizing that, him talking to me wasn't going to make me happy.

It bothers me when people live their lives in the future, because you can't. We are right now, in this day and age, here, not there. Hoping is not a bad thing, but hoping for happiness that is based on the outcomes of other things is, in my opinion. As an…

Why I Chose Open Adoption for My Baby: Written for

This guest post is by Makena, a birthmother. As a high school student and one of a handful of birth mothers in Idaho with an open adoption, explaining my situation to friends and acquaintances is complicated. How many high school girls know what a birth mother is? Not enough, to be honest. For many people, open adoption is a scary concept because it’s new and a different type of adoption than they’re used to. So why did I choose to place my son in an open adoption? The real question is how could I not have placed him? If I were parenting him right now, this is how it would be: I would go to school during the day and work in the evenings. Mason would be in daycare all day. We would be barely financially stable. Mason doesn’t sleep at night so I wouldn’t get any sleep either. I wouldn’t be able to give him nice toys, clothes, or be able to snuggle with him like children need, and he would have no father figure at home. Placing Mason in a financially stable home with a mother who would sp…

My Open Adoption Experience in a 17 Minute Nutshell

My Open Adoption and Birthmother Story: Full Length Video

The Elephant and The Box

It would be so easy for me to deny that I was a birthmother. I haven't simply because I love being a birthmother. I could never deny something like that. I love how big my family has grown because of one choice I made.

Due to the decisions I made in my past, it led me to where I am now. I learned to embrace the consequences of those decisions. Not all consequences are bad. Mistakes often lead to gaining experience and blessings.

And most people don't realize that. I'm often seen as the elephant in the room when it comes to experiences in life.

I haven't met someone with the exact same experiences as myself, but I have found one person here or there that have experienced similar things. There is only one thing we can do with those experiences.

Use them to our advantage and teach others to help them through their own trials. Hiding our experiences in a box under the bed isn't going to help us move forward. We don't have to be the elephant in the room. I pro…

Dear Person Who Called Me Irresponsible And Seventeen

Yes I am seventeens years old. Yes I chose to place my child in an open adoption. And yes I took all the responsibility for my actions, and the other birth parent's actions. And yes that means I am responsible. There are no sides for who's the better birth parent. There is a child in a beautiful family and home that will have a successful life. That is all that matters. There are no sides in adoption. There is family.  If someone chooses to not be a part of that, it's their decision that should be respected. If I can respect that decision, then so can anyone else. I may not agree with that person's decisions, but I can be the bigger person and respect them. Just like I hope people to respect my decision, that I placed my birth child and chose to have a relationship with that child.This is for someone special. Hopefully the message gets across. Have a nice day. -Love Makena, a birthmother with feelings and agency.

Dear High School Students

Dear High School Students,
I know you're just a human, but I also know that every action is a decision. Being in high school is hard. Being in a public high school with thousands of peers is hard. What is also very hard is being an expectant parent and in high school.
The thing is, let's be real, a lot of teenagers have premarital intercourse. Yes, sex if you don't know what the term intercourse is. In high school, you get judged, we've learned that growing up. You get judged on the way you dress, the way you speak, the way you eat, how much you eat, how many friends you have, how many friends you don't have, your race, your gender, your nationality, your ethnicity, your religion, your sexual orientation, you hair color, your bra size, your body size, who you're related to, who you live next to, who you're nice to, who you're not nice to, etc etc the list goes on for miles.
Did you know most expectant teens drop out of high school, or switch to onlin…

Hello Jessie and Kevin! How We Got To This Strong Adoption Relationship

My birth son's parent and my relationship is a very strong relationship. The day I knew that they were  to be the parents of the child I was expecting, I sent them an email. I'll be honest, due to the miscommunication of LDS this message took a long while to get through, and I couldn't originally figure out their correct email. So by the time the email went through, I knew they were my adoptive couple.

"Hello Jessie and Kevin!
I'm Makena Porter and I am a birth mom in Meridian, Idaho! I know lots about you but however I'm guessing you don't know a lot about me! I'm 16 and in high school, I'm going into web design and photography. I have a lot of family, I'm the middle child of 7 kids, I have two parents, my father passed away almost two years ago, and my mom is an amazing woman!  I hope to get to know you guys better and meet you guys soon too! And sorry I couldn't get to email you till today, my LDS counselor, Edene, gave me the wrong one…

A Hospital Gift

Today is a special day for a family friend of mine. We are sitting here in the hospital waiting for the pitocin to kick in. In almost completed silence and listening to the monitor of the baby's movement, this is breathtaking. It's safe to say that there is something beautiful going to happen. This Mother is sitting waiting to feel contractions, it's actually quite funny. She's at a 6 and hasn't felt contractions, even though the screen is showing huge contractions. The I.V. only took 8 pricks and stabs to her arms to actually work. It's very different to experience someone else going through the birthing process. When I was brought into the hospital it was a very fast and anticipating process. Actually sitting and being patient for me is very hard, so waiting for this baby is unique and a challenge for me. I was asked to take pictures of the hospital stay. I've been sitting here listening to giggles from the mother, and her husband. Listening to apologie…

A Piece of Hope From Someone Who Had Lost It

Hope. It is sometimes a really hard thing to have. In life, we find ourselves in situations we can’t understand. Whether it be infertility, an unexpected pregnancy, relationship problems, health conditions, the death of loved ones, or any other life changing situation, we have all lost hope. We have all found ourselves in that place where we are so overwhelmed and can’t find the way out.
There are adoptive couples who struggle with being chosen to raise a child and complete their family. There are failed adoption placements. There are children who cannot find their birth parents. There are birth parents who are promised openness to see their birth child, and then never get to see that beautiful child again. There are families who are torn apart by illness or divorce. There are families who lose children, parents, and spouses. There are women who find themselves alone, scared, and pregnant. There are an endless amount of situations that are difficult and challenging. And this is where …

The Love of a Birth Mother

Published on: and

Yes, it was hard, so hard, but I had to put that aside and focus on doing the right thing for the child growing inside of me. Being 16 and pregnant was not easy. I was going to school everyday and going to LDS Seminary every morning, which started at 6:25 a.m.. Socially, my mom and I kept it a secret from everyone except Parker, my bishop, my church leader, and my caseworker. Once I was about 4 months along, and showing pretty big, we let my school know, my family know, and my church know. The reactions to the big news were not as bad as most would be. I was supported greatly in school and church, the reaction of my family was hard to bear.

I had some siblings that became overprotective and some that distanced themselves a lot from me. My mom helped me through a lot, and I am forever grateful for her. People would ask me why I chose to place my child in an adoption. My answer is one that I will always stand by. I want to giv…

Introduction of Myself

In 1997 a little girl was born. She was born to 2 parents, and 3 older sisters. As she reached age 8 she had gotten 3 younger brothers too. She was 1 of 7 children. Her name is Makena. I thought about writing this in 3rd person the whole time, but it didn't seem right. So I will finish this shortened story normally. In April of 2012, I was in 8th grade. And it was a life-changing month for me. On the 15th my dad had gotten in a car accident. He hit a horse on the high way, he was on his way to Las Vegas for a business trip. Of all things to hit, it was a pregnant horse. He was in a Comma for exactly 5 days, once everyone who needed to see him had said their goodbyes he passed away on his own. That trial in my life led me to meet so many amazing people and I have learned a lot of lessons since. After my dad passed away I went looking for male attention and love in all the wrong places. November of 2013 I had found myself in a very unknown position. I found out I was pregnant, and i…